Confessions of a Single Dad

Let’s be real—single fatherhood is like being handed a manual written in a foreign language, with pages missing, and somehow, it’s on fire.

I didn’t exactly sign up for this. I don’t think any of us do. When I pictured fatherhood, I imagined being part of a dynamic duo—two parents, tag-teaming the tantrums, the soccer practices, and the “Dad, I need a costume for school tomorrow” emergencies.

But life had other plans.

One day, I found myself standing in my quiet house, staring at a sink full of dishes, a pile of laundry that had possibly become sentient, and the overwhelming realization that it was all on me now.

I’d love to say I took it like a champ, but the truth is, I panicked. I burned dinner (multiple times), I forgot picture day, and I may or may not have once sent my kid to school with socks that definitely did not match.

But somewhere along the way, in the chaos and exhaustion, I found something I never expected: peace.

Not the kind that comes from getting a full eight hours of sleep (because let’s be honest, that’s a myth). Not the kind that comes from finally getting caught up on laundry (also a myth). But the kind of peace that stays even when life is messy. The kind of peace that comes from knowing I’m not in this alone.

So here’s my confession—this is how I found peace in the midst of difficulty.

1. I Stopped Pretending I Had It All Together

I tried. Oh, I tried to be the single dad who had it all figured out. The dad who packed Pinterest-worthy lunches, kept a spotless house, and never, ever lost his cool.

But reality hit fast.

Like the time I confidently volunteered to do my daughter’s hair for picture day, only for her to come home looking like she had barely survived a hurricane. Or the time I put dish soap in the dishwasher and flooded my kitchen with suds.

The truth is, single parenting is messy, exhausting, and full of moments that make you question your life choices.

But the moment I stopped trying to pretend I had it all together, something incredible happened—I found freedom.

2 Corinthians 12:9 says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

God never asked me to be a perfect dad. He asked me to be a present one. And that? That I could do.

2. I Learned to Laugh at the Chaos

If there’s one thing single parenting will teach you, it’s that sometimes, you just have to laugh.

Like the time I took my kid to the grocery store, and he loudly announced to the cashier that I had forgotten to brush my teeth that morning. Or the time my daughter said, “Dad, you need a girlfriend… your outfits don’t match.”

Kids have a way of humbling you. But they also have a way of reminding you not to take life so seriously.

Proverbs 17:22 says, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”

If I let every spilled drink, every lost shoe, and every unexpected challenge steal my joy, I’d be miserable. But when I choose to laugh, even at my own failures, I’m reminded that life doesn’t have to be perfect to be good.

3. I Stopped Comparing Myself to “Perfect” Families

For a while, I fell into the comparison trap.

I’d see families at church, smiling and holding hands, and I’d think, That was supposed to be us.

I’d see dads at the park with their wives, and I’d wonder if my kids felt like they were missing out.

Comparison is a thief. It steals your joy, your peace, and your ability to see the blessings right in front of you.

Psalm 139:14 says, “I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.”

God didn’t make a mistake when He put me in this role. My family might not look like everyone else’s, but that doesn’t mean it’s broken.

I stopped trying to recreate the picture I had in my head and started embracing the beautiful, messy, grace-filled life God had given me. And that changed everything.

4. I Let Go of What I Can’t Control

Spoiler alert: I am not in control.

Not of the weather (which has ruined every picnic I’ve ever planned). Not of my kids’ attitudes (which can shift from sweet to feral in 2.5 seconds). And definitely not of life’s unexpected twists and turns.

At first, this drove me crazy. I wanted to fix everything. I wanted to make life smooth and easy for my kids. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t control everything.

So I did the only thing left to do: I surrendered.

Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

I found peace when I let go. When I stopped obsessing over what I couldn’t change and started trusting the One who never changes.

5. I Found My Strength in God, Not Myself

There have been nights when I’ve collapsed on the couch after bedtime, utterly exhausted, wondering if I’m doing enough.

There have been moments when I’ve felt alone, when the weight of responsibility felt crushing.

But in those moments, I’ve found strength in something bigger than myself.

Isaiah 41:10 says, “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

I am not doing this alone.

Even when I feel inadequate, God is enough. Even when I feel weak, He is strong. Even when I have no idea what I’m doing (which is often), He does.

And that? That gives me peace.

Final Thoughts from a Single Dad Still Figuring It Out

If you’re a single dad reading this, let me tell you something: You’re doing better than you think.

Your kids don’t need perfection. They don’t need a superhero. They just need you. A dad who loves them, prays for them, and shows up—even when life is hard.

Peace doesn’t come from having everything figured out. It comes from trusting the One who does.

So take a deep breath. Give yourself grace. Laugh at the chaos. And know that you are not in this alone.

And maybe… just maybe… double-check that the dishwasher detergent isn’t actually dish soap before you start the next load.

Dads, what’s one thing that’s helped you find peace in this journey? Let’s encourage each other in the comments! #SingleDadLife #FaithOverFear #ParentingWithGrace

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